I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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