I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Randomize
