I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
