Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
