yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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