Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
You are the jesus of drinking
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Randomize
