Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
