Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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