There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
