so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize