Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
