Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
