I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
