Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
