actually, I'm a sock model
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
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