Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
