I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
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