so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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