So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
