So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize
