youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
