making cat noises will not fix the situation.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
