I want you more than these girls want KFC
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
