from now on my penis is your penis
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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