it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
