Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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