you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
