I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
