your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
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