my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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