how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Life is so much better after having sex.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.