So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize