Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
