At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
