My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I have aggressive nipples.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize