just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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