New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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