You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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