I can't breathe out the right side of my face
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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