That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
