I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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