Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
