Don't you send me to vm
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize