He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Randomize
