mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
