So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
