Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
