lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
