no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
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She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
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You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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