office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Randomize
